Did I ever mention that my husband wants us to live in a bunker? That is his dream house. Underground. Cement walls at least 2 feet thick. Hidden entrance. I asked him how I was supposed to decorate that. He asked why we would even need to decorate - cots, folding chairs, card tables, tin plates and cups... what more do we need?
Now I should also mention that he is not involved in any conspiracy theories about people coming to get us or the end of the world. After 21 years in the Army, he is just most comfortable with very basic surroundings and sparse amounts of "stuff". I don't think he knows what to do with all the furniture, decorations, and collectibles we have in the house. At least he wipes his feet before he comes in the door...
I guess if he really wants to live in a bunker, I should consider that. I don't know exactly where we would find one around here. I don't think the Homeowners Association would be really happy with that. Unless we just found a neighborhood full of bunkers.
I'm beginning to wonder if I will ever achieve my dream of moving to London to become a Garden Gnome Polisher. That is what I really want to do. I bet there is minimal paperwork involved. And all of the different types of gnomes... just imagine!!! I bet I wouldn't get bored.
London and gnomes have not come up in our recent search for a house to buy. I'm much more likely to find cement armadillos and longhorns where we live, but keeping them clean is just a piss-poor substitution for polishing gnomes. I'm very partial to fat, jolly gnomes. The skinny ones sometimes look evil. I don't want to be involved with evil gnomes.
Now of course, I liked the Underpants Gnomes from South Park. Granted, they were stealing underpants and I don't approve of theft, but they were still pretty funny.