For fun, for love of the sound of words, for play, for delight, for joy and celebration at the art of communication.
For only five short, bold, beautiful minutes. Unscripted and unedited. We just write without worrying if it’s just right or not.
Won’t you join us?
1. Write for 5 minutes flat – no editing, no over thinking, no backtracking.
2. Link back here and invite others to join in.
3. Most importantly: leave a comment for the person who linked up before you – encouraging them in their writing!
OK, are you ready? Give me your best five minutes on:
Tired…
Go
Wow, I don't know if "tired" was a good prompt for me. I'm tired, alright, but not tired in a "I've just finished a good job and now I'm worn out" type of way. I'm tired of many things, though.
I'm tired of all of the pettiness in my family. I'm tired of my husband's boss managing by fear. I'm tired of our children thinking we need to take care of them - well, one child anyway. I'm just tired.
Christmas was always a huge time of celebration for Mama and me. It was our special time. We love decorating together. We loved baking together. We loved singing along with John Denver and the Muppets together. It was awesome.
Now this is my first Christmas without Mama, and the thought of it makes me tired. The thought of more and more years without her makes me tired. Yes, I know I will see her again. Just the waiting makes me tired.
The depression that hounds me makes me tired. I wish that my body chemicals were not so screwed up. Then I might be able to face a day without coaching myself to want to get up and taking medicines. It is tiring to be tired all the time, you know? I'm not sure why this is my particular cross to bear, but it might be a good thing if I am saving somebody else from having to deal with it.
What I know for sure about being tired is that God has promised us rest. I won't be tired forever because He has told me so. And that is something to look forward to.
God's promises... always a good note to end on.
Go
Wow, I don't know if "tired" was a good prompt for me. I'm tired, alright, but not tired in a "I've just finished a good job and now I'm worn out" type of way. I'm tired of many things, though.
I'm tired of all of the pettiness in my family. I'm tired of my husband's boss managing by fear. I'm tired of our children thinking we need to take care of them - well, one child anyway. I'm just tired.
Christmas was always a huge time of celebration for Mama and me. It was our special time. We love decorating together. We loved baking together. We loved singing along with John Denver and the Muppets together. It was awesome.
Now this is my first Christmas without Mama, and the thought of it makes me tired. The thought of more and more years without her makes me tired. Yes, I know I will see her again. Just the waiting makes me tired.
The depression that hounds me makes me tired. I wish that my body chemicals were not so screwed up. Then I might be able to face a day without coaching myself to want to get up and taking medicines. It is tiring to be tired all the time, you know? I'm not sure why this is my particular cross to bear, but it might be a good thing if I am saving somebody else from having to deal with it.
What I know for sure about being tired is that God has promised us rest. I won't be tired forever because He has told me so. And that is something to look forward to.
God's promises... always a good note to end on.
Stop
As always, I'm linking up with Lisa-Jo, the Gypsy Mama, and the rest of the gang for Five Minute Friday. Definitely go check out what other people are saying over there!
***
For the six lovely people who entered the giveaway for a copy of All is Grace by Brennan Manning and John Blase, we have a winner!
Number 4 is Angela Downs! Yea, Angela! Email me your address, Angela, and I will mail you the book!
I enjoy this so much that I think I'm going to have to start searching for the next book to giveaway. Suggestions?
so sorry for this first christmas without your mom...I say a prayer right now...that you will find that true rest in Him...HIs love and comfort...
ReplyDeleteBlessings to you...
Carolyn, I am so sorry about the loss of your mom. Your post here is so beautiful and powerful, and I am grateful for your transparency. I pray His covering over you as you mourn. I pray for His provision, His strength to restore and continue to bring hope. I know you know He has you. Bless you. (P.S. I grew up listening to John Denver and the Muppets, too!) :)
ReplyDeleteloved this post for so many reasons i can't seem to find words for. maybe because i understood so much of it.
ReplyDeleteand praying for you during this difficult time of loss. that you would know His peace and comfort in real and tangible ways.
I won? *Looks around* Me? I WON! :)
ReplyDeleteYay! Thanks, Carolyn...I never win anything! I just want to take a moment to thank a few people...first of all, God, without whom none of this would be possible...oh, wait...that's my Pulitzer acceptance speech...
LOL, just kidding...but seriously, yay! I'm so glad I won...I'll email you my address tonight. Thanks for doing this...contests giveaways are FUN!
As for your post...girl, I am so sorry you're having to go through your first Christmas without your mom. I can't even imagine. My mom and I always sing together at Christmas, too...one of our faves is "Thistlehair" by Alabama. Do you know it? Here's a link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmaqNqaoPqo.
I love you, friend. I will be praying for you through this holiday season.
This is the kind of tired that keeps hanging on until I get to the place of that last bit you leave us with. When I am heart-weary tired, that is where I go.
ReplyDeleteHappy Advent-ing, Carolyn!
Praying for you, for your first Christmas without your mom, and for rest.
ReplyDeleteThank you all for your prayers and well wishes. I feel every one of them. God has blessed me with this community.
ReplyDeleteThat kind of tired. I know it. Praying He gives you fresh eyes to see His beauty and the vision of Mama singing Alleluias with the angels. Holding your hand as we walk together in this season.
ReplyDelete@Sandra, oh how I wish we lived closer together. I'm glad my Mama was waiting there to welcome your Mama when she got home (the REAL home!). Praying for you as the process begins.
ReplyDelete"Piggy pudding?" "No, figgy pudding. It's made with figs." "Oh." "And bacon." Wishing you laughter through tears.
ReplyDelete