Truth

I don't have any earth-shaking original thoughts tonight. I just have something I want to share. 

I went on a cleaning spree this afternoon (the closet looks fabulous) and of course I found things that were laying there waiting for some attention. One of these things was a quote that I had printed out. It turns out it is actually a quote of one man quoting another (that really does make sense - I promise). It is a profound bit of writing, so I thought I would share it with you.

"Truth, like all the other pieces of armor, is in actuality an aspect of the nature of God himself. Thus to put on the belt of truth is to put on Christ. For Christ is 'truth' (John 14:6), and Christians are the bearers of truth. As Os Guinness explains, Christianity is not true because it works (pragmatism); it is not true because it feels right (subjectivism); it is not true because it's 'my truth' (relativism). It is true because it is anchored in the person of Christ. 'The Christian faith is not true because it works; it works because it is true. It is not true because we experience it; we experience it - deeply and gloriously - because it is true. It is not simply "true for us"; it is true for any who seek in order to find, because truth is true even if nobody believes it, and falsehood is false even if everybody believes it. That is why truth does not yield to opinion, fashion, numbers, office, or sincerity - it is simply true and that is the end of it.'"

-- The Covering: God's Plan to Protect You From Evil by Hank Hanegraaff

I'm hoping my proofreader will tell me that I have all of my quote marks correct on that one (' vs. "). Either way, I just really liked that quote. It makes life simple, which is how I'm sure God wanted it in the first place. No need to complicate things with trying to add to, subtract from, or outright change the truth. It is The Truth. Beautiful simplicity that I need to observe more often.

Blessings to all of you.

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Once again I am joining up with Jen and the rest of the Soli Deo Gloria Sisterhood over here. Why don't you come see what the rest of the girls have going on?

I Know My Truth (?)

Oh, how I hate the memories that can still reduce me to tears. I seriously wish that I could amputate those useless thoughts. Yet there they are, taking up rent-free space in my head. I can keep them quiet for fairly long stretches, but that doesn't reduce their power. They still get a seat at the board meeting every time I assess my worth. 

Tonight is one of those nights when such a memory has come back full force. It has actually come up several times this week, not really by my choice. Ignoring it has not made it go away, although I have put some serious effort into that. I wish I had the kind of faith that thought even having these memories was happening for a true purpose, but I'm not sure I can stretch quite that far.

I called a friend when the memory came back up. I was sniveling and not making much sense, but I finally got the story out. I asked her, "Wouldn't that make you feel pretty bad about yourself?". She said, "Yes, but you know your truth now". I do? What is my truth? Is it that what other people say about me doesn't make a difference? Or is it that the opinions of me held by my loved ones really do matter and shape my world? Is my truth that I'm good enough, smart enough, and darn it, people like me? Or is it that I have been a wasted effort for many years? Better yet, which one of those ideas is supposed to be my truth?

Let me tell you a story. Maybe you can help me decide what to think about it.

It's Not An Event - It's A Process

What was I thinking? Really - what was I thinking? Did I expect that I would just tell my truth and then everything would be all better? We all came together as a community for Tamara's project and it was so awesome to know we weren't alone. But...

But the Father of Lies...he was not happy with us trying to walk down the path of healing together...or at least he sure didn't want me on that path... So in the midst of trying to heal and hear God's voice, I end up in the middle of spiritual warfare. This is what makes me not want to tell my truth sometimes. I know - I know - that the attack is going to come. The lies are going to start pouring into my head. And I think, maybe if I sit really still and don't say anything, he will leave me alone. He might, you know. But then I will have been immobilized. Isn't that what the enemy wants?

As I read the essays in the Community Collection, the little voices started. "You thought you told your truth, Carolyn? Well what about..." "Did you forget exactly how soiled you really are? What do you think this will accomplish?" Faces started to flash in my mind. Faces of ones I had tried to forget. Faces of the ones that I still try to protect and say that it was all my fault. Faces of the ones who are Facebook friends so I stay silent for fear of an attack. It's so easy to tell myself that since I had a part in it that I should just take the full blame. I gave away my innocence and gained culpability. It's so easy to believe the lies.

One Other Thought...

Charles, what I said in the last post about loving you was important. Just in case something else stupid threatens us, remind me of this...

Forever your girl,

Things I Know Right This Minute

1. Step-parenting is not for sissies. Even when the kids are grown.

2. Having the keys to ALL of the electric panel boxes in the house is a really good thing.

3. It is a waste of time to have resentments against dead people. I really need to move these people out of my head so it will be less crowded.

4. Time flies when you are Facebooking with friends.

5. Eating a pink monkey for dinner is not the same thing as buying a pet elephant. Learn to differentiate.

6. Telling the truth is highly underrated. Having the ability to do it will set you apart from the pack.

7. I'm going to end this post with a dangling parti-thistle.

Click on the photo to go to the Bungled Jungle website. 

It's a blast!

(God told me to write about what I'm learning and these are all very important things - except for maybe #2 - I'm told you can bust the lock if needed.)

Mom's Testimony

Taking a break from our regularly-schedule Mercy message... ;)  A few days ago, I shared some of my grief over Mom. I think it is only appropriate that I share the Good News she shared too.

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Both my sister and I spoke at my Mother's funeral. Suzanne spoke eloquently about Mom's legacy and I spoke (not as eloquently) about Mom's testimony. I want to share with you now what I shared at the funeral -- not because I wrote it. Not even because it is about Mom. I want to share it with you because of what Mom's testimony says about Jesus Christ. She would want you to hear the Message too.


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In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God. All things were made through him, and without him was not anything made that was made. In him was life, and the life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it. (John 1)

Claris Shaw spent her life teaching her children about the Word. She taught us that Jesus was our friend, our salvation, and our refuge. She taught us that He was the Truth that would set us free.

In January of 2011, Mom started reading a 365-day Bible. She read every day, no matter what else was going on. On Feb. 5th, a stroke attacked the communication center in her brain. Her ability to speak, to comprehend, and to read was deeply affected. She lost memories. She lost vocabulary. She lost speech skills. She lost whole concepts.

The one thing that did not leave her was the Word of God and her love for it. A dear, dear friend would come to read the Word to Claris several days a week. Even when she was in pain or disturbed, calm would come over her as the Word was being read. Even with the loss of memories she still remembered passages that she loved and requested them. There was no power, illness, or tragedy that could steal the Word from her. Even after she had her second stoke, even after she was sedated, the Word was read to her and at each reading it was a peace that came over her. She had true faith in the WORD. The Bible says in both the Old and New Testaments that the Lord will never leave us nor forsake us. Jesus, the Word who spoke her into being, never left my Mom. This is the testimony of Claris Shaw. The Word is Truth. The Word is Life.